When I was about 10 or 11 I went to a magic camp. This was a camp for kids interested in magic. The Copperfield/Henning type. It was sponsored by one of the largest Magic Stores in New York City, Tannen’s.
The camp was a place where you could meet professionals, attend seminars, and see shows. At the end of the week there was a talent show. My first year there I had an act I was going to do in the talent show. It involved a floating scarf… and the theme to Close Encounters. About a day before the show a magician came up to me working with the apparatus and told me I was doing it all wrong.
It was strange, he wasn’t known for stand up magic. He worked primarily in cards and coins. He showed me how to hold the apparatus in an entirely different manner which basically made it impossible for all of the work I’d do for the talent show. He asked me what I was planning to do with it and when I showed him, he told me it’d be entirely wrong and people wouldn’t like it.
I didn’t think I could work up an entirely new routine in a day, so I dropped out of the talent show. Afterwards, the guys in my room asked why I didn’t do the talent show. I explained it and they told me I shouldn’t have listened to the guy. At 10 or 11, you don’t necessarily know who you are and aren’t supposed to listen to, or when you’re supposed to trust your instinct over the experts.
In general I have found so many instances in my life where an “Expert” has come up to me and told me, “No, it’s completely wrong.” I’ve grown a thicker skin over time and gotten better at judging my instinct and judging someone else’s ‘expertise.’ But the issue I take is the expert who condemns.
My College advisor (and then head of our theatre department) once told me not to audition for musicals, because I wasn’t a singer. (I later joined the nationally touring chorus) I wasn’t a strong college student in my undergrad. I admit it. When my advisor decided to leave the university he looked me in the eye and told me, “I consider you my biggest academic failure of my career.”
We are all capable of waving the “This is wrong” flag. Personally, I think the real experts will never carry that flag. They have a, “How can we make this better” flag.
See, the issue isn’t someone telling me it’s wrong or it’s bad and making me feel like I should dotingly follow their neo-charasmatic lead. The fact is, that the attitude is simply not constructive. It invalidates any work or effort put in. And it really just doesn’t motivate the worker to try to succeed on any level. This feeling of the air of motivation being ‘let out’ is exaggerated when you know that the expert, is really quite incompetent.
And I thought I’d had my fill of co-workers who wanted to ruin my life and undermine my work back at Pitt.
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That is a very interesting story. It kind of reminds me of why I stopped trying to be Christian, because our local priest (who later put the moves on my little brother) kept telling me I’d never get to heaven if…well basically if I kept insisting on thinking for myself. He didn’t scare me into accepting his beleifs, as I’m sure he intended. But he did succeed in inspring me to find my own path.
There are a lot of people waiting around to point out what others are doing wrong. It’s very easy to find fault; while finding solutions takes real talent. I often daydream reliving my childhood with the knowlege I have now…I’d give a great many people the “what for” if you know what I mean.
I’ve been to Tannen’s only a handful of times, some of the people that work there are total age snobs. Meaning that I’ve been given the 2nd degree cause I’m younger.
That’s horrible, what that magician guy did.
Don’t let others discourage you. For each person who tells you what you cannot do, remember that you have at least 10 friends around who will tell you that you can.
Bad day? Hugs to ya.
And hopefully that advisor gets all the kharma he’s earned.
I have only spoken with Tannen’s and definitely ran into the occasional attitude on the phone. I HAVE been to Hank Lee’s and can say that depending on who you talk to — you may either get the most helpful encouraging person you can imagine behind the counter, or you will get someone with a raised eyebrow toward your budget. As far as experts go, well, Shumada is one of my favorites for impressing with what would normally be far from impressive. An airbrush artist/thread-worker I knew in Erie, PA used to get crap from “experts” as to his thread-work, but the guy totally blew my mind every time I saw him work, so I figured the “experts” must just have been jealous of his creativity, coming up with techniques they had never considered. It seems that way in a lot of pools I have waded in — the “experts” always put down the innovator because the innovator makes them look like a Peter Principal Poster Child. There you go — new acronym for ya to use when annoyingly stifled — PPPC.
I had to smile at your mention of Henning. Last I heard, he was into something much more akin to magick, something about truly “angle-free” levitation. Now you’ve gone and done it — gonna have to hunt up my fan back Tally-Ho’s for a little work out 🙂
See, the issue isn’t someone telling me it’s wrong or it’s bad and making me feel like I should dotingly follow their neo-charasmatic lead. The fact is, that the attitude is simply not constructive.
And it really just doesn’t motivate the worker to try to succeed on any level.
Granted, I didn’t learn this till I was an adult, but my response is, “Really?! ::blank stare:: This way has always worked for ME”. Or, “Naah, that’s not really my style”. There are more, but you get the idea.
Let’s make a “This is right!” flag!!
(or, for those of the other persuasion, “This is left”)
Co-workers with unconstructive critism will be banned from my country too
You always have citizenship there
Hugs from afar!
J