I’m pretty sure that I have mild Apnea. I don’t get a lot of dreams anymore. At least not ones I remember. So when I have a night full of dreams… it’s strange.

Much like the study of occult symbols… your dreams are typically a symbolic trek through the subconscious involving whatever you fed it with most recently.

Let’s take a look inside Hermann’s Head...

And now the highlights of an Andrei Dream:
Of course it’s been 10 minutes and I’ve fed the overly affectionate (read hungry) cat. So the dreams already have begun to fade.

I was at the software developer’s conference I missed last week. There were seminars. I was realizing that the first day of seminars had 2 seminars left and the penultimate one for the day was pushing into 24 hours straight. I was pleased that I’d made it thru them all, but was getting punchy none the less.

When I got out to my car I discovered the doors were open and that not only had the stereo been ripped out, but so had the status monitor console. This is similar to what really happened to my Saturn in L.A. Dreams at this point to me are disturbing. One.. they are plausible; two they are based on actual events. So you go through that feeling of absolute reality. Ignoring that i made it back through the garage to the party. One of the people there I vaguely knew from college. I didn’t really get along with her (I think she walked out of a class I was in in college because she hated the prof and what he was teaching)… Well, she was a real sorority b#^% then. She waked past me and as I went to talk to her she gave me a look of absolute disdain, (distaste, dislike.. there was a lot of dis’n going on in that look)… I shrugged it off.

I made a technobabble comment at the party in the form of a complex (yet non-sensical) mathematical equation. A few people chuckled, I commented that the perfect punchline would happen if someone missing from the party were there. Just then the doorbell rang. It was T’ealc. Everyone cheered. I looked down the stairs to the door at him and said I needed him to react to a statement. I babbled more non-sensical Techno speak to prompt him to say, “Indeed” {If you’re not a Stargate SG-1 fan.. don’t ask) He chuckled knowing what I wanted him to say. But he didn’t want to. But he had to… He started to short out like Robby the Robot in Forbidden Planet (How’s that for the obscurities of Andrei’s sub conscious!) He fell over. (Um, dead?)

People at the party were disappointed. I’d just killed T’ealc with paradox. The A.D. from the television show suggested we could revive him. He directed me to run around the room and get a count of all the plants that were there. I started to count and then realized something was weird about the request. (Because no one ever notices how weird the whole dream is to begin with) I said, “This is a practical joke isn’t it?” When I looked down the stairs Christopher Judge (the actor that plays T’ealc) was standing with a big grin on his face.

The rest of the dream gets fuzzy. I’m back at the conference at a soda shop (maybe) I’m telling the story of how the seminar’s first day of classes was going. Just as I’m about to tell the people at my table how long they lasted, someone I know locally and have no respect for pokes in their head and tells everyone my last fact. The person then ducks away to be with their friends elsewhere.

There’s also a conveyor belt where they are filming a commercial. There are large boxes on the belt and one out of every three boxes is being ‘shrunk’ down. Either me or someone else is placing their hand on every third box and it is shrinking from the touch. The company providing this service is talking about how we ‘shrink 1 in 3 yadda yadda yadda’. There is a loud double beep that occurs.

People begin emerging from the office. I can’t tell if it’s an office, an audition hall, or a hair salon. Many of the blonde girls that were there are now coming out with chocolate brown hair. (Not actual hair made of chocolate, just the colour)… it looks very unnatural. But they are all happy. I try to catch up with the woman who I knew from college (why i continue to pursue this point is entirely beyond me now when I’m awake) But they are all walking away, have chocolate brown hair and I do not recognize any of them.

One of the still blonde girls is complaining vehemently to one of the cb-haired girls. I’m not sure if she’s complaining about not being able to get her hair coloured, being separate from the group, or the fact that others did colour her hair. The two girls exit the with the blonde still yelling at her counterpart.

I see two guys on a bench arguing and hitting each other with laptops. (Oh yes, software conference)… I ask them if everything is okay. They tell me everything is fine they just have a disagreement. They tell me this with incredibly thick French accents and broken English. I ask if they are roommates in the same dorm. They don’t understand me so make several more attempts to communicate this question. I talk more slowly, gesture, and simplify my language.

I try to contact the dorm monitor but realize while it’s ringing that the name on the dial monitor says that I’m calling a relative of shimmeringjemmy that I don’t really ever want to talk to. (In reality, this person does not exist) I hang up and tell the guys that perhaps they should spend some time apart to reevaluate and reassess their friendship. They agree heartily and thank me. Confusedly victorious at the feeling of my successful counseling (?) I go over to the next bench where a friend* of mine is sitting. I put my head in her lap. I open my eyes and I am resting my head on shimmeringjemmy‘s shoulder in bed. I am awake.

Please note… there is a very long story about the nameless friend* at the end of my dream. But that may have to wait for a long time until I think what (if ever) to post on her.

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