I have a phone line for my Apolo Productions work. The phone is listed as “Apolo Productions.”

I get constant calls from Vendors that want me to lease credit card machines. I also get calls from agencies who want to list us.

So far this has got to be one of the stupidest script bound callers I have ever received:

AP: Me on the phone as Apolo Productions
CA: Caller

Phone: (Ring)
AP: “Apolo Productions…”
CA:” Hi this is Info…USA. Have we reached the business, ‘Apolo Productions?'”
AP: “That’d be why we answer the phone Apolo Productions” (smiling chuckle)
CA: “And is it that you’re located in Sunomish… Washington?”
AP: “Yes we are…may I ask who you are and why you’re asking these questions?”
CA: “Sure. This is Info…USA. We provide information for online search engines. We’re just calling to do our updates.”
(Ed: I’ve never heard of Info, USA. We’ve never given them information to update in the first place)
AP: “Yeah.. Okay. You’re calling to do an update for…. your services?”
CA: “Yes sir. We provide information for online search engines. Such as Yahoo Yellow Pages and we’re just calling to do our updates.”
AP: “What information do you need?”
CA: “Are you still located in Shunomish… Washington” (Ed: Question was already answered)
AP: “Sno-homish.”
CA: “Snohomish, I’m sorry… (lists zip)”
AP: “That’s Correct”
CA: “And what is the address for this location”
AP: “It’s unpublished”
CA: “Is there a separate mailing address?”
AP: “Basically, we take electronic contact only.”
CA: “And what is the name of the owner of President, working at this location?” (Ed: As opposed to the owner working at our second location?)
AP: Andrei Freeman
CA: “And what is Mr. Freeman’s job title?”
AP: (Pause due to the question) Owner or president.
CA: “And how many employees work at this location.”
AP: Long thoughtful pause. Sounds of counting… “One… We’re big time here.”
CA: “And may I have Mr. Freeman’s email, if there is one available?.”
AP: (I give my apolo email)
CA: “And may I have your job title sir?”
AP: “Owner or president”
CA: “Okay, thank you sir. And you have a wonderful day.”
AP: “Thank you so much”

Now, I will admit… I was a bit of a smart ass on this call. I was never snide in my voice. But I have to admit… from question one my respect for whoever was going thru their phone script dropped to zero.

The person on the line was always Stepford-plesant. Never reacted to anything that was said. Pressed on thru the script regardless of the obviousness of the situations. I am slowly coming to the opinion that any company that feels this is the level of customer interaction they should offer is a company that really isn’t worth my time.

Just my morning rant. Off to the office.

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