I really wouldn’t mind having my servers beaten and this popping up on everyone’s LJ.
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Karl Rove has called an Obama Landslide.
Rove (the engineer of the Bush campaign) has called a 338-200 EV Victory for Obama, with the junior senator picking up the votes for PA, VA, OH, FL, and NV. Rove hands the dead heat ties of MO, NC, and ND to McCain.
States that he have a within 4% on the polls add another potential (albeit unlikely) 68 EVs. The 1% or less states: ND, IN, NC, and MO are 40 EVs on their own. 378-160 would approach the routing of Bob Dole by Clinton (379-159).
I never thought I’d say this, but thanks to Karl Rove, I’m going to allow myself to be mildly optimistic tonight.
I’ll be leaving the office at 3. People who wish to join our news night feel free to show up any time after (say) 4:30.
I hope that tomorrow I will replace “Yes we can” with “Yes we did”
But because I think we’re on the verge of the change we’ve needed for not just 8 years, but maybe going back to the Nixon administration:
Vote tomorrow. Everyone. But I think I side with the majority this time.
This posting is meant as political humour and any offence taken can be filed under /dev/null
Jesus Endorses Barack Obama; GOP calls Foul
With cries of obvious voter fraud and poll manipulation; Republican analyst Tom “Sparky” Eibinhauer pronounced that the endorsement of Barack Obama was a last ditch ploy to garner the liberal and social ‘devout’ group. “As far as the voter rolls noted this guy was marked as ‘dead’ last cycle and this smacks of some of the tricks that ACORN pulled.” McCain campaign aide Linda Comodatina further pointed out that she didn’t even believe that Jesus was in fact a legal American citizen pointing at his documented ‘Middle East’ origins. Despite this latest accusation, however, several members of the Utah Republican contingency assure our offices that Jesus is in fact American.
In Georgia the lambasting of “Jesus the Carpenter” has taken a further ugly turn. Congressional candidate Brent Underminer highlights Jesus’s lack of relevance due to being no more than a community organiser. He further has linked the ‘cult leader’ to activities as a religious separatist, not merely being a member of, but in fact potentially leading an organisation described as “The Supper 13.” Campaign ads from the North Carolina candidate for the 3rd district sewage and treatment plant (a position with a rotating 4 week term) Hank Hankus, suggests that the religious separatism proves that the Christian Lord and Saviour is Godless. Hankus’ campaign staff could not be reached for comment on this.
Entertainer Jon Stewart of Comedy Central’s “Daily Show” is now scheduled to interview the Christian Messiah on Monday’s “Night before the Election” special. Says Stewart, “I have no idea what to ask him? I mean as a Jew the only level I can relate on is to ask how it was to give up being Kosher.” Stewart’s associate Steven Colbert followed up with, “Oh Come now Jon. Don’t be a pansy.” Comedy central was also unavailable for comment but did respond in a press junket by announcing that it would air a week of new “South Park” episodes satiring the endorsement.
This is a developing story…