Messaged a friend this morning: This was the discourse –

Me:
Good morning, Starshine. The Earth says, “How ya doin?”

C:
The Earth, as a rule, doesn’t give a damn how I’m doing.

Me:
Oh, no it does. It told me. It has about 14 people in the world that it decided to consciously concern itself with and surprisingly you are one of 3 Americans. One is a paraplegic in Wyoming, the other is an intern with Henson’s Creature shop
I pause for a moment
Um, could you forget what I just said. I don’t think I was supposed to tell you that

C:
I love my friends.

Me:
?

C:
How many people do you know who’d just come out with that, spontaneously?

Me:
What, besides me?
You

C:
My point exactly. Not many of us, so I like the ones there are.

Me:
On a regular basis, I check in with my wife, “So, are you bored with me?”

C:
I take it she says No.

Me:
So far

I then relayed the conversation to my wife and it continued:

H:
Though why would the Earth tell you about these things if you weren’t one of the people it concerns itself with?

Me:
Oh, it doesn’t concern itself with me. It assumes I can do fine on my own. Actually sometimes comes to me for advise. Well, sometimes; normally it gets annoyed with me when I accidentally tip the vessel of knowledge when it comes to its personal interests. But, you know how it goes 😉

H:
You give advice to the Earth. And it hasn’t spontaneously sprouted a volcano in Washington DC?

Me:
Temporally. What the hell do you think Mt. Saint Hellen’s was. It was the time equivalent of a shot just over the bow.
Oh, wait, you said DC

H:
yeeeess

Me:
We’re working on that
I pause for a moment
Um, could you forget what I just told you. I don’t think I was supposed to say that

H:
*snicker*